Which was odd....

Thu, 25 Oct 2012 13:11:25 GMT

I've just received possibly the best begging-for-money email I've ever seen.

Dear Flick,

I cannot help but gasp at the technical wizardry that you have at your fingertips. It may seem commonplace to you, but in my day, I did not even dream of being able to despatch a message such as this one at the touch of a button.

Today, students come to pose by me while an image of them is taken using another new invention, the mobile phone.

Now, Flick, many a student have I seen pass through these doors and you... Well if memory serves you studied Geological Sciences only to depart in 2000?

It is gratifying to make your acquaintance once more, but I do not break my long silence for such pleasantries alone.

Recent changes in the way higher education is funded leave me troubled. From my glass box in the South Cloisters, I have observed the development of a proud tradition of academic excellence at UCL, with radical thinking as our distinguishing feature.

At this time of change, UCL’s tradition of radical thinking must be protected and I am asking for your help to do so. In fact, if I may, I would ask you to match the gift I made when monies were first sought for the University. £100 I gave then and a fine sum that was. Today it would help offer scholarships and bursaries to less privileged students or support research. It’s your choice.

It is my hope that you are so taken with these wonderfully swift new electronic communications that it is also the medium in which you wish to give your support to UCL.

If so, I believe the expression is ‘click here’ and you may make your gift now, without even having to reach about your person for whatever gold coins you may have about you.

In recognition of your kindness and generosity, I have prepared an unusual gift for you. It is a paper balloon taking the form of my head. Fear not, it is not life-size and makes a fine ornament for a writing desk or shelf. It is intended to remind you of your time at UCL, a unique place of learning and not only for my presence.

This paper balloon is for UCL alumni and friends only and will be sent to you flattened in an envelope for you to manipulate into a three-dimensional form. It only remains for me to thank you for your generosity.

Your obedient servant,

Jeremy Bentham

PS The news that UCL is rated 4th in the world by the QS World University Rankings 2012/13 fills me with pride – a pride I hope you share. UCL is ahead of a certain institution I attended myself.

There's also a photo of the balloon. It's terrifying. It may almost be worth a hundred quid.

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Which was odd....